Monday, February 7, 2011

the hardest job

I remember hearing that parenting is the hardest job.... but before becoming a parent I thought that was ridiculous. Babies are cute and small, kids are fun and energetic - how hard could it be?

Now, I can't believe how wonderfully difficult it is. The constant worry and work.

lost socks

overdue library books

overdue haircuts

a cough in the night

tears of hurt feelings

Yet, through the work I see the reason for the work smiling at me or wanting me to sit with them. Elizabeth truly wants to still be in the same room with me at all times. "Moma," "Mom" and "Mommy" echo through the house reminding me why I work and work.

Nate wonders what the boys will remember of their childhood. Oh, they will remember his first smile when he picks them up. They will remember the silliness and attention to detail that is him authenically. I will be there to fill in the details (some real and some imagined I admit) accompanied by rooms full of pictures and heads full of memories.

Because what the kids will remember is the love, the warmth, and the attention. Will they always be happy with our decisions or want to change an outcome? Of course, because thats what we all did - but I aim for a general satisfaction of contentment that we were there. Showing love, warmth and attention.

Note to self.... remember that when you hear the word mom for the hundredth time or when you step on a lego in the middle of the night. Remember that when you are tired but they want one last hug or tuck in.